The 411 on how to get it done. 2014 was the year of Ice Bucket Challenges and Kim K breaking the Internet. It was also coincidentally the year of me breaking my sex life into thousands of pieces. This called for a brief six-month hiatus to figure out what exactly I wanted from guys—and from my vagina. After awhile, I realized it wasn’t a stable boyfriend I was after, but instead a mind-blowing orgasm. I suspected I could somehow achieve this on my own. Sure, sometimes an I-never-knew-my-body-could-look-so-much-like-a-pretzel hookup can do wonders, but I thought that if I was going to consider myself a true sexpert, a little experimentation was necessary. While I am all about au natural, I figured why not switch it up and use technology to achieve the perfect O? I rounded up two of my girls and decided it was time for a little field trip to Vibrator Village to invest in something even better than a boyfriend. What we learned is that the best sex comes from being empowered, and toys aren’t just for kids. So do yourself a favor and grab an adult toy (you’re allowed to play too), do a little experimenting, and follow these tips to become a self-serving goddess.
Luckily, making your first ever vibrator purchase is less intimidating than it may seem. There are plenty of online resources with reviews to give you an idea of each one’s differences and the ones that work best for your body. However, with something as personal as this, it might be more helpful to have a little face-to-face interaction. I knew as much about vibrators as I knew about sports: absolutely nothing. For me, having someone there to not judge me when I giggled at these handy-dandy tools was a must. Search for local sex shops in your area, and call first with any questions just to feel out the type of service and knowledge offered. The most important thing is that you feel comfortable with the experience. I asked about 100 questions before making my decision; which vibrator is best for beginners, which material is best, and how does that fit inside anyone? All inquiries are valid, so definitely ask away! That way you can leave knowing you have the tool to satisfy you in the right way without breaking the bank—or your vagina.
It is definitely easy to get overwhelmed; they haven’t quite found a way to fill a Toys-R-Us sized store with adult toys, but the selection is still pretty daunting. You can choose from thousands of tickling, buzzing, twisting, and battery-operated objects meant to bring you pleasure, so how can you possibly know where to start? I definitely didn’t.
Vibrators and dildos are the two main doors into sex toy land, but the best place to start is with a vibrator. As more than half of all women can reach orgasm solely through clitoral stimulation, there are three basic options to make sure the clit is being serviced as much as you need. These three types are great for beginners looking to reach anything from a complete orgasm to some extra clitoral lovin’.
C-love: These are vibrators that focus entirely on clitoral stimulation. These typically come in wand form or smaller versions of a regular vibrator. They can be placed on the clit for maximum stimulation. You will see a lot of these in an egg or bullet shape, but when purchasing one in wand form, look for a head that rotates side to side rather than up and down. The left to right movement keeps the clit from becoming too sensitive and allows for multiple orgasms in a close range of time. These types of vibrators are great for girls who know they need their C to O.
What’s up Doc? A rabbit vibrator is the best happy medium for someone looking for both external and internal pleasure. This is a two-pronged vibrator that allows you to service the clitoris and the vagina simultaneously. It is called a rabbit because the outer prong of the toy tends to resemble a pair of rabbit ears. These typically are made of rubber, silicone, or latex and come in a wide range of colors and sizes.
You’re a G: We all need a little G-spot loving, and while it is not quite as easy to find as Young Money makes it sound, some girls feel like it’s the magic lamp that just cant be reached—or rubbed for that matter. So grab a friend (a G-spot vibrator that is) and get searching. A G-spot vibrator is similar to a regular vibrator but it has a curve and usually some sort of softer coating, either a jelly or silicone texture. The curve tends to happen more in the tip for these kinds of vibrators so there is an optimal reach back to the G-spot.
You might be a girl who knows her G-spot like the back of her hand but needs a little more clitoral stimulation, or the other way around, but this is a gotta-collect-them-all scenario. Did you have just one toy as a kid? Didn’t think so. It is totally okay to just grab one and see where it takes you or start building your collection now with a basket full. Some sex shops even offer toy chests for your special collection.
Now while these aren’t the real things, there are still some safety precautions to take for the down-there area. Buying your first vibrator is an investment, no matter how much you choose to spend, and without proper care, they have the potential to contract harmful bacteria and even STI’s. Make sure to use these safety tips for a clean and healthy relationship with your new best friend.
Mr. Clean: Cleaning them is crucial. This may sound like a duh moment but many women forget to clean their sex toys. The best way to keep up with this is doing a quick rinse off after use with warm water and a gentle soap or even a pH-balanced wash like Summer’s Eve cleanser. Most stores even sell a special spray. This will keep the bacteria to a minimum and ensure your toy will be around a lot longer.
Lather up: Lube is great, but make sure you are using a kind that won’t be harmful to the material of your toy. Most water-based lubricants should be fine with the jelly or silicone outer shell, but make sure to ask if they are compatible before purchasing.
Finders, Keepers: Not that you plan on hanging it next to a picture of Mom and Dad, but make sure your vibrator is stored somewhere safe and concealed. The silicone finish can attract dust and other air particles, making it grimy. It’s also important to check the batteries once in a while and even pop them out if you aren’t using it frequently to avoid corrosion.
With a little research and the right mindset, this is the kind of commitment so worth making. Grab a friend and gear up for the sure-to-be-eventful process of buying your first sex toy. Once you find your soul mate, maybe a G-spot for your V-spot, make sure to give him a little extra love and care to ensure a long and happy life with your main man. Go get some good vibrations!